Stuff from March 2008.

Compromise
Saturday March 08, 2008

“Somedays I feel like shit.”

I look at you, and I wish that I had more to say sometimes. I’m not a talkative person - you know that - but I still feel like I should have more to say. It’s not that I don’t have anything to say or I don’t feel anything, I just express it in different ways. I keep to myself more often than not because it allows me to think about everything. Analyze it, poke it, and hopefully come to some kind of conclusion.

I had always believed that things were going well. Very well to tell the truth. I wasn’t aware of what was going on, and I feel terrible about that. I wish I weren’t so absent minded. I wish I weren’t so oblivious. It’d make me a better person, more attentive, maybe even more passionate. I don’t know. I can wish all these things but really, it doesn’t do a darn thing. I have to do something about it - and I am, really. I don’t work quickly though. I get locked into a mode and that’s how it is for a while. Slowly I’ll get out of it. It’s not a matter of that’s how things work, it’s how I work.

I’m kind of just rambling. I don’t even know why I’m typing out all of this. Maybe because it makes me feel better. I don’t write enough anymore. I don’t do much of what I like to do anymore. That’s not your fault, it’s mine. I’m changing (or trying to). I’m changing for you - I wish you’d do more of that for me sometimes. You’d probably argue that you do, but I’m talking about something else that I can’t explain or elaborate on. I hate not having the words for what I feel.

I want you to be happy. If you can’t be that with me, then I probably shouldn’t be around. I would hate myself for dragging you down because of my selfish love. I wish I knew what to do.

I haven’t had Pho in a long time. I really want some.

Hajime
Thursday March 27, 2008

Here we go again. So of course, this certainly isn’t my new website or anything. It’s the same one that I’ve had for a few years now, just with some tweaks. I put more work into the backend more than anything, and it all starts with a brand new server. I expanded my gaming blog to include other platforms, as my gaming has recently expanded to almost every other platform not made by Nintendo. I haven’t watched any anime recently, but I want to try to get back into that (at least a little), so expect some updates there. I did delete the Naruto category since I just totally ditched the series. RSS is back, along with much cleaner URLs.

I’;m probably going to start designing a brand new site once I have the time and the inspiration. For now I’ll continue to tweak this one till it dies.

Outside of the internet, things have been going quite well. Then again, I can only tell you what I think, and that’s what I think. I have no reason to believe otherwise, so I’m going with that. I’ve pretty much gotten used to my new living situation, but there are always the little things that bother me (or someone else).

So in brief: Switched from Samsung, to iPod, to Zune. Bought an Xbox 360 and a bunch of games. Bought a PSP and a few games. Kawaii Kon is less than a month away. Got a Helio Ocean (which I am very happy with). Bought a new computer, new monitor, and a new printer. Upgraded the video card on the new computer to a Nvidia GeForce 8800GT. Playing Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: Ring of Fates on the DS. Didn’t get any bonuses from Wal-Mart (or the Assistant Manager position for that matter). Need to have surgery done. Saw Incubus, Brand New, and MxPx in concert. I also love Shannon.

Time for sleep. Work tomorrow. Good night.

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